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My Single Peeps: Lawrence J.

Lawrence is a South African Jew who has been in Southern California since he was 10. I met him through his sister, Francine, who briefly dated my eldest brother after they met abroad on a high-school trip. I hadn鈥檛 seen Francine in years, so she tagged along for the interview.
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May 9, 2012

Lawrence is a South African Jew who has been in Southern California since he was 10. I met him through his sister, Francine, who briefly dated my eldest brother after they met abroad on a high-school trip. I hadn鈥檛 seen Francine in years, so she tagged along for the interview.

Lawrence is wearing a 鈥淐at in the Hat鈥 T-shirt and a pair of flip-flops when we meet. He鈥檚 got sleeve tattoos and an eyebrow piercing. He makes statements like, 鈥淚 really want to change the world,鈥 and he says it so sincerely and with such excitement that he reminds me of a naive college freshman taking his first sociology class. But he鈥檚 a divorced 42-year-old father with three daughters, and he鈥檚 well aware of the complexities in the world. Six years ago, Lawrence was married and working six days a week running a very successful stone and tile business he had started at 21 鈥 designing his own lines and distributing them around the United States. 鈥淚 also have some retail stores.鈥 He emulated his father. 鈥淭he way we were raised in South Africa, you had kids, had a career and made a lot of money,鈥 Francine says. But his divorce rocked him to his foundation. 鈥淚 also got sober at the same time,鈥 he adds.

鈥淚 restructured my business, so I put in 10 hours a week at the office. It always used to be just about money 鈥 that鈥檚 how I was raised. Now, I just want to love everyone.鈥 His sister jokes with him, 鈥淲ho are you? Do I know you?鈥 He continues, 鈥淚n my personal life I鈥檓 trying to be really honest and ethical and present, and trying to bring my business in line with that. I鈥檓 trying to have every person who works for me get paid days every month to go out and work in their community. We look for anyone who鈥檚 struggling and look for ways to help them. A couple of years ago, some of my staff who work in my San Diego store went on a mission to Mexico to help build houses for people who couldn鈥檛 afford to build their own homes.鈥

Lawrence tells me about getting his toenails painted with his daughters 鈥 鈥淚 don鈥檛 want to miss out on something if they鈥檙e doing it. My exterior looks like it鈥檚 really out there, but my values and everything are traditional. Family鈥檚 important to me. I鈥檓 looking for someone who鈥檚 close to their family 鈥 that鈥檚 really, really important to me. I鈥檓 looking for someone who鈥檚 spiritual, grounded and has a strong sense of self. Spiritual practice would be No. 1. Intelligence would be No. 2. What I鈥檓 craving more than anything in my life is connectivity 鈥 and the only part of my life where I haven鈥檛 found that is in a relationship.鈥

I ask him what he sees his life like with a girlfriend. 鈥淚鈥檇 love to travel with them, meditate with them, do yoga with them, camp and hike 鈥 do one of the trails 鈥 as long as they鈥檒l protect me from the bears. I鈥檓 scared of the bears,鈥 he says. Francine jokes, 鈥渁nd the dark.鈥 He agrees, 鈥淎 little bit. I slept with a light on until I was 36. It didn鈥檛 dawn on me that I wasn鈥檛 scared of the dark until I got divorced. I didn鈥檛 know I liked stinky cheese either. And olives.鈥 He laughs. 鈥淚 believe in fairy tales. I love romantic movies. My daughters look at me in the middle of romantic movies, and I鈥檓 crying.鈥

If you鈥檙e interested in anyone you see on My Single Peeps, send an e-mail and a picture, including the person鈥檚 name in the subject line, to mysinglepeeps@jewishjournal.com, and we鈥檒l forward it to your favorite peep.


Seth Menachem is an actor and writer living in Los Angeles with his wife and daughter. You can see more of his work on his Web site, , and meet even more single peeps at .

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